Just one of those days.....

I know that I have not blogged in FOREVER…..so please forgive that this first post in over a month is going to be me being a “negative Nancy”.

Today was quite the adventure. Sometimes, well almost always, I am in the mood for a wild time. Today…not so much and the LAST thing I wanted was a crazy adventure.

We had a late start leaving Jinja because my bungee pictures were not uploading on my computer and I had to go back to the place where we jumped to get them reloaded. We had bus reservations in Kampala at 2:00pm to head to Lira and the bus from Jinja wasn’t loaded and ready until noon. We were hopeful that we would make it in time….but then it started down pouring and the traffic once in Kampala was a nightmare. With the mixture of those two, we thought it would be best to jump off the coaster and get on some Boda’s(motorcycle taxi’s)  to take us to the bus park. Mind you, it is raining, I have my pink carry-on suitcase, backpack and a couple of sacks….way too much to travel on boda’s around kampala….but hey, it’s an adventure right?!? It all sounded fun in the beginning!

I have always said that I would never take a Boda in downtown Kampala because it is dangerous and the traffic is crazy. I did it on the day we left for Jinja and survived and in this moment we had no other choice. Seriously, maybe God has me take these because my prayer life increases drastically every time J

So we whistle over some boda’s (still raining) and I load up with my carry-on suitcase in front of the driver, over the handle bars and me on the back. Ronald and Cord hop on another. I was told that the bus park we were headed to was “very near”…which in Ugandan does not mean it is close J We take off and my Boda speeds past Cord and Ronald. We are zipping in and out of cars, squeezing our way through the tight traffic. Imagine a parking lot of cars….now picture a motorcycle between parked cars….now picture all of those vehicles moving….yup, that was me. Pretty sure we even scraped a few as we passed. I am holding my breath and praying for survival J

We are now down to 5 min left to make it to our bus. These buses leave exactly when they are supposed to and when my boda finally got me there, I see our bus pulling out. “Mzungu, Mzungu! Is that your bus you want? Chase it, chase it! Boda, take her!” The Ugandans were trying to be helpful and my boda took off following the bus. At this point, I have no idea where Cord and Ronald are at and even if we caught up to the bus I wasn’t quite sure what I was going to do!

The bus was refusing to pull over to let me on and at this point I was so frustrated, covered in mud and soaking wet. The Boda continues to follow the bus and then all of the sudden another motorcycle comes out of nowhere, is parallel to us and then rams right into us! I grab the driver, thinking “dear God we are going to flip.” I was trying to brace myself for whatever was going to happen next and how to handle the fall the best. I was imaging a huge pile up if we crashed and then all the bodas and cars behind us running over us.  The motorcycle is out of control and we are wobbling and tilting back and forth.

The crazy roads
 

By God’s amazing protection, the boda was able to get control of the bike and we continued moving forward. He was still trying to catch the bus, but it was impossible and all I wanted was to get off the stupid boda! I told him to stop, but he kept going. I yelled a little louder…he still kept going. Finally, I just screamed in his ear “ Stop now!!!!”. He finally got the point. I jumped off and in that moment all I wanted to do was cry. I was soaked, my luggage was muddy and drenched, my body was shaking and I had no idea where Cord and Ronald were….I just wanted a freakin car! J

I took a deep breath, pulled up my big girl panties and knew that I had to get back on the boda to get to Ronald and Cord. I met them safely and then we took off walking to another bus park. I was told, “it’s just down the road”…Yeah right…..

We start walking in the muddy, jammed pack streets. I am trying to protect all my stuff and be aware of someone unzipping my backpack from behind….seriously insane streets at this moment. So thankful for burly men to help carry my load and a bright pink suitcase J  I looked at Ronald, half smiling/laughing, half NOT, saying “I do not want adventure right now. I do not like this at all right now…get me to the bus! J”

Streets we had to walk through

We finally make it, load up the bus to find out that we still have 2 hours to wait until it fills up and can leave. Cord brings me my beloved Coke Zero (the only diet soda here) and I remember that I had some oreos in my bag. I sit down and for about 3.4 minutes I am relaxed. However, my peaceful moment is disrupted from then on with vendors crowding the aisles of the bus and getting in your face to buy their products….for the NEXT 2 HOURS! I feel claustrophobic often here because Ugandans or Africans in general have no concept of personal space….so needless to say; I had to practice a lot of deep breathing and taking vacations in my mind as I sat on the bus.

Why not have Matooke and Beans while you wait!?

Once we got moving (and crammed more people into the aisles for the 5 hour ride) I began to realize how normal this is becoming. This has been my normal for the past couple of months and will still be my normal for another month. I am not sure if I am ready for this all to end….in 30 days.

Bus Park

I am going to try REALLY hard to update my blog as frequently as possible throughout this next month. There is so much in store and even if there are days like today when I really don’t want an adventure….I will embrace it and remember that I will probably wake up the next morning itching for some drama J

 

 

Just a Momma and her Boys!

I was having a very difficult time finding joy today (or should I say CHOOSING joy). I was irritable and overwhelmed with all that we were still trying to figure out in planning for the team that is coming from the states on Saturday.

Isn’t it just like our God to see us exactly where we are and to be so kind as to send along a special blessing to pick us up when we need it? We don’t deserve it, I especially didn’t deserve it, yet He loves to shower us with kindness and to ultimately do this so that we once again are reminded that God is in control and all we need to do is rest in Him.

We were driving through town after leaving one of the schools and headed back to Jane’s. We were parked quickly, as someone jumped out to grab something. Someone then pointed out that some of our street kids ( laughing that I just said “our”, yes I am claiming them now) that we work with twice a week at Child Restoration Outreach were walking by. I jumped out and called to them. Immediately, they turned, had huge grins on their faces and came over to greet me. They are able to eat porridge in the mornings and have lunch at CRO, but they are not fed dinner. I asked them if they were hungry (more through sign language and rubbing their bellies) and wanted to go get some food.

I told the others I was with that I was going to hang out with the boys, Bruno and Oscar and go get some food. They drove off and it was the first time I had ever been alone with these boys without a translator (personally, they can be over-rated at times J) I LOVED every second of it! And of course, sweet Jane then calls me after driving off to remind me to keep an eye on my backpack! J

Bruno

We walked through town a bit until we stopped at a hole-in-the-wall restaurant. We ordered three big plates of rice and three big plates of chicken! The boys were ecstatic when I asked them if they wanted a soda and looked like such gentleman as they put their straws in the bottles and sipped their drink!

We were nearly finished with our food, when Bruno and Oscar started yelling out to some other street kids (also from CRO) that were walking by to come over. These boys, who have nothing, immediately began sharing whatever they had left of their food with their friends. Of course, I had to have them join us! “Waitress, three more orders of rice and chicken and soda!”

Oscar

I had no idea what they were talking about…but they were laughing, giggling, making faces, telling jokes….for a moment in time they were able to be children. They could eat trusting that they didn’t have to fight for their food or have it taken from them. I don’t think my smile ever washed from my face the whole time I sat with them…watching, listening, learning. For moment in time, as I looked at all five of them devouring their food, I felt like just a momma and her boys!

They had so much gratitude and many “apoyo’s” (thank you) were exchanged. If only they were able to understand English I would have told them….”no, thank YOU. Yes, I might have bought some dinner for you…but YOU filled my heart tonight. You brought back the joy that was missing. You teach me about strength and perseverance every time I am with you”

Their bellies were all protruding a bit more than before dinner, a sign that they were satisfied. I hugged them all and we parted ways. They were on their way to find a spot to safely sleep for the night. Walking away was a little easier knowing that at least their tummies would not be grumbling and hopefully sleep would come a little bit easier for them tonight.

Solomon, Ochenosen, Suna

As I walked through the town in the dark on my way home, my heart finally felt more alive. How can something that simple, that little… restore such life? Easy….it’s the art of giving. It’s the fact that being a part of something GREATER is what God has intended for our life….and especially for our hearts.

"Lost in Love" tank or t-shirt!

Ever since I have been here in Lira, Uganda and assisting Children of Peace Uganda I have seen so much need. We are daily handing over money to assist the leaders of Children of Peace, provide money for drivers, cars and fuel, food, art supplies, treatment materials, stops to the clinic for some of the children and so much more!

I am asking for your help! Make a purchase that makes a difference! With a purchase of a "Lost in Love" tank or t-shirt you will be directly assisting in meeting the needs right here on the ground! How cool is that!!! Your money will have a direct effect on the work we do with these former child soldiers!

Sale is open until August 8th! Please spread the word and share to all of your friends like crazy!

Purchase here: http://karihamilton.storenvy.com

Dream BIG!

Today, I sat in a room with doctors, nurses, engineers, pastors, pilots, carpenters, mommies to orphans and a few presidents. What a bunch, huh?? These children of war know how to dream! This is what gives me hope. I recently worked with a group of kids that have received no trauma care and many of them were unable to dream. The children I worked with today give me hope, that soon all these children who have faced traumatic experiences will be able to dream.

 Before I came here, I had a rough couple of months. I am beginning to see why God led me through some trials during that time, so I could share more from my heart the importance of dreaming, even though it is hard. A wise counselor, Jan Meyes-Proett, shared with me that when we push down our deepest desires and do not face them, we put ourselves in a very vulnerable place. We end up doing things that we know is not what we truly desire deep down in the depths of our hearts…but in the moment it seems easier and we rather trade in feeling that at least some of our needs are being met, rather than every part of our heart.

 I have been able to pass this wisdom on to these brave hearts and challenge them to DREAM BIG…bigger than getting school fees, bigger than just a job. Who are they going to BE? How are others going to SEE them? Who are they in the depths of their soul? It is hard and very frightening. You are walking in unknown territory and we don’t know if our dreams will come true…but we dream anyways!

 These children have more strength and ability to dream than I do. I watch them draw, I hear them share…with power in their voice, confidence in their demeanor. They BELIEVE, they TRUST and they walk by FAITH…Lord teach me to dream like them.

 When asked what they are thankful for, these children respond “wisdom” “knowledge” “that God protected me” “that I am ALIVE”…no child in America that I have worked with has ever responded in this way. These children know how to be grateful.

 I walked into the room and asked the group if they remembered what their assignment was from a few days ago. They nodded their heads, grinned and shouted, “DREAM BIG!” Oh I wish I had that moment on recording so you could hear the hope and courage in their voices.

 They put their heads down and listened as I guided them through an imagery activity of picturing their dream. Can’t you just seem them in the future? As I watch them I want to climb inside their minds to see where they are going, what they are doing.

 They sit up and begin to put whatever image that was in their mind into a drawing or words. For a moment in time they see themselves as ABLE, as ACHIEVERS and most of all as DREAMERS. They hear that “All things are possible through Christ” and that they are capable of making meaning of their past through finding their purpose in the here and now.

 All we can do is present our heart, in its truest, purest form to God and trust and believe that He sees and hears all of our innermost desires and will lead us to a place where….

 DREAMS REALLY DO COME TRUE.

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

On Thursday (12^th) we went to a community in Ogur. This is close to Baarylonyo, and if you google this you will read about a massacre that occurred here from the LRA (Lord’s Resistance Army). We were greeted with waving palm branches, singing and dancing from the children and mothers. Africans LOVE to sing and dance and I truly believe this is how they heal. Many of the kids sang for us and it appeared that they wrote their own lyrics about the pain that they have been through, yet how they have survived.

We met with about 50 kids/youth and some child-mothers. All of these children fit the target population that Children of Peace Uganda work’s with. Former child soldiers, abducted, born in captivity or child mothers. We split them up into different age groups and began relationship building through games, songs and dance!

I had the teenagers and we did a few drama games and then we did the “lighthouse” activity (you can read about this in an earlier post).

God then had some plans that I was not prepared for. Our time with them on this day was supposed to be nothing more than just getting to know them and to get familiar with one another before we start the peace clubs with them. We had a little bit of time left and so we had the group come back together. We thought it might be fun to just give them a piece of paper and a marker and have them draw whatever they wanted. I had the translator communicate to them to draw whatever was on their heart.

Their stories came pouring out. I was walking around and as my eyes were glancing at their papers I started seeing guns, villages on fire, rebels, individuals tied up…..and so much more. I began to get a bit nervous because we did not plan for this to happen. We didn’t have the time to sit with each child and talk about what they were drawing. But God had a plan.

I began to stop to sit with a few at a time and ask them what they were drawing. “my village on fire” “watching the rebels kill people” “ here they are tying up all the kids together and placing heavy things on their head to carry” “me holding a gun” “my parents are dead in this picture, I watched them get murdered”…..and the stories kept coming….

I saw a boy (Peter, 16) sitting on the bench staring at his picture. He looked completely lost in it…wrapped up in whatever it was he had drawn. I made my way over to him. I asked him if he would be willing to share with me what he drew. Tears immediately starting welling up in his eyes. He shared about how he was remembering how the children were taken from their homes. Then, he pointed to a picture of a rebel pointing a gun at a mother and her baby. I asked him who that was. He replied “that’s me”….as more tears began streaming down his face. My heart was breaking and I found myself struggling to keep my own tears from pouring out.

He wanted prayer. Prayers of forgiveness. He told me he felt so bad and wondered if God would ever forgive him for what he did. I no longer held my tears in. I wept with him. I held him and prayed with the strength and power of Jesus Christ. I found myself taking the greatest pain in my own life that I have experienced and multiplying that by about 100….to try and understand. It is too great. Too great for me or for you or for him, Peter….but not too great for our God.

Peter and I

As we left our time there, we were escorted out with…can you guess?? Singing and dancing. God sees them. There is no therapy intervention that could bring ultimate healing to these children. The trauma is so severe. Yes, they can learn some skills and we will teach them those skills and different ways to express their pain and their stories. But only God can put their broken heart back together. Only God can turn their memories of terror into beauty. Only God.

Meet the children/youth at Lira Boarding School

I know for me, once I have a name and a face to put with a story it all becomes THAT MUCH more real. Meet the children and youth that are in our Peace Club at Lira Integrated Boarding School. Please take your time. Look into their eyes. Imagine what they would tell you if they could speak. Say a prayer for them. These children have either been former child soldiers, abducted or born in captivity.

Lira Integrated Boarding School

On Wednesday after we met with the street kids, we later went to Lira Integrated Boarding School. This is another place where we are implementing the peace clubs. There are about 30 kids here that fall into Children of Peace’s target group of being abducted, former child soldiers, born in captivity, or child-mothers (gave birth in the bush due to being raped by the rebels).

I am so thankful that my fabulous friend and fear-less leader taught me about “Flex Pills” on my very first trip to Africa in 2010. You never know what the day will hold, and even though you have an agenda and a time schedule to follow, sometimes it just doesn’t happen! We were supposed to have an hour with these kids, but we arrived a bit late, had to meet with the headmaster and then it took awhile for all the kid to get to us. So we ended up only have an half an hour.

But it was a good start to the Empower Program. We spent time explaining what the Empower Program was and the various activities that we will be doing with them.

Since we didn’t have a whole lot of time, I thought it would be good for them to decide as a group what they wanted the rules to be. It is so interesting to me, because in my mind I think about what former kids in my groups back in America have said or done during some of these activities.... and it is so interesting to compare the differences! As they began to list what rules they wanted so that they all felt safe to open up and share I was floored. Here is what they came up with:

1.    Time Management

2.    Cooperation

3.    Discipline

4.    Love one another

5.    Obedience

6.    Respect one another

7.    Forgive one another

8.    Be open to share

9.    What is said in group, stays in group

10.  Have Fun!!!!

We will start trust and team building activities with them on Saturday!